How to Write a Bride Speech

For years, the bride sat quietly while the men did all the talking. Not any more. More and more brides are standing up at their own wedding to say a few words, and guests love it.

If you’re thinking about it, do it. It’s your day, and nobody can say what it means to you better than you can. This guide will help you work out what to say, who to thank, and how to share the job with your new husband or wife.

• Should you give one, how long, and when
• How to write it, step by step
• A simple structure to follow
• Sharing the thank-yous with your new spouse
• Humour, nerves, and what to leave out
• Common questions

Should the bride give a speech?

There’s no rule saying you should, and no rule saying you shouldn’t. If you’d like to, it’s a lovely thing to do. You might want to thank your parents yourself, say something to your new spouse in front of everyone, or simply share how you feel on the day.

How long? Three to four minutes is about right, or around 400 to 500 words. With three or four speeches in a row, shorter is kinder to your guests.

Length	Spoken time	Words (approx.)
Short	About 2 minutes	260
Standard	3 to 4 minutes	450
Longer	About 5 minutes	650

When? There’s no fixed slot, so choose what feels right:

• Straight after your dad, before the groom. It keeps the family thank-yous together.
• Just before or after the groom. You can split the thank-yous between you.
• Last of all. A heartfelt ending to the speeches, especially if the best man has left the room in stitches.
• Together with your new spouse. A joint speech, taking turns.

Writing a bride speech, step by step

1. Decide what you want to say that nobody else will. Your dad will talk about you. The best man will talk about your new spouse. What’s left for you? Usually it’s thanking the people who matter to you, and telling your partner how you feel.
2. Agree the thank-yous with your partner. Decide who’s thanking whom, so nobody gets thanked twice and nobody gets missed.
3. Think about your parents. What they’ve done for you, not just for the wedding. This is often the most moving part of a bride’s speech.
4. Think about your new in-laws. A warm word of welcome and thanks goes a long way.
5. Remember your bridesmaids and friends. What they’ve done for you during the planning, and on the day.
6. Write about your partner. How you met, when you knew, what you love about them. Speak to them, not about them.
7. End with a toast. To your new husband or wife, or to your family and friends.
8. Practise it out loud, more than once. Especially the emotional bits. Time it, and cut anything that drags.

A simple bride speech structure

1. The opening (30 seconds). Something light. A first “my husband” or “my wife” usually gets a cheer. Thank the previous speaker if there was one.
2. Your thank-yous (1 to 2 minutes). Your parents, your new in-laws, your bridesmaids, anyone who helped. Specific and sincere.
3. Anyone who can’t be there (15 seconds). A short, warm mention of loved ones who have died or couldn’t make it.
4. Your new spouse (1 minute). How you met, what you love about them, what today means. Look at them for this part.
5. The toast (15 seconds). “Please raise your glasses to my husband, James.” Or to family and friends.

Can’t find the words? Our bride speech writer asks about your partner, how you met and who you’d like to thank, then writes three versions for you to choose from. You can read the opening for free before deciding.

Sharing the thank-yous with your new spouse

If you’re both speaking, the biggest risk is two long lists of the same thank-yous. Sit down together a week or two before and divide them up. One simple split:

You thank	Your partner thanks
Your own parents	Their own parents
Your new in-laws	Their new in-laws
The bridesmaids	The best man and ushers
Your friends who helped	The guests, especially those who travelled
Anyone on your side who can’t be there	Anyone on their side who can’t be there

Then keep the part about each other separate. It’s lovely for the room to hear both of you say what the other means to you, and it doesn’t matter if the stories overlap a little.

If you’re giving a joint speech, take turns: one does the welcome, the other the families, and so on. Finish together, with a toast you say at the same time. Rehearse it, as it’s harder than it looks.

Humour, nerves, and what to leave out

You don’t have to be funny. But a light moment or two settles your nerves and the room’s.

• Gentle teasing of your new spouse. Their cooking, their sense of direction, how long it took them to propose.
• A nod to the planning. The spreadsheets, the seating plan dramas, the day you nearly eloped instead.
• A friendly dig at the best man. Especially if you speak after him.

If you’re nervous, keep it short, print it in a large font, and practise in front of your bridesmaids. Hold your notes rather than your phone. If you well up, smile, take a sip of water and carry on. It’s your wedding. Nobody expects you to be dry-eyed.

What to leave out

• Exes. Not even a hint.
• Hen do stories. Leave them in Benidorm.
• Wedding planning stress. A light joke is fine. A full account of the florist drama isn’t.
• Long lists. Name the people who matter most, and thank everyone else as a group.
• Anything that would upset either family. Today’s about bringing them together.

Want some help with it?

You’ve planned every detail of the day. The speech doesn’t have to be another job on the list. Our bride speech writer can help.

Tell us about your partner, how you met, who you’d like to thank and a story or two. We write three versions of your speech, from mostly funny to mostly heartfelt, all built around your own memories. You read how it opens for free, and only pay £14.99 if you love it.

Use it as it is, or as a starting point to make it your own.

Bride speech questions

More speech guides

Giving a different wedding speech? Read our guides to the best man speech, father of the bride speech, groom speech and maid of honour speech.